Just because you can, definitely means that you should.

Here in crown town, and in other 'tropolisis that tend to show up on obesity stat-maps as uncommonly overweight, we have these things. And they are called Fried Pickles.

They are on my top-5 things that made me move to Charlotte list. No, I'm not kidding. Good god, are they good, in a sick-to-your-stomach kind of way - similar to the sinking, queasy feeling you'd get when eating the entire can of cake frosting with a spoon as a kid.  Or, you know, last week.

I had a mature batch of kimchi. I had some cake flour. Batch of vegan ranch. And the desire for tempura. And so, this monstrosity happened:

Greasy, salty, stinky. AWESOME.

Batter was simple - flour, water, dash of oil, some korean pepper paste and salt. Dash baking soda. Vamanos.

But wait, what's this?

Is that the afore-mentioned pickley tempura wrapped in rice and nori, with avocado and daiya, topped by sesame nayo? Is it? WHY YES, YES IT IS.

Before you guys all tell me I'm not the first, well, hey, I know that. But it's 100% vegan. And ain't nowhere in this city to get it that way, 'cept my kitchen.

Tempura Kimchi Kim Bap with Avocado, Daiya, and Sesame Nayo
makes 3-4 rolls

For the tempura kimchi:

1 handful squeezed kimchi

1/2 cup cold water
1/2 cup cake flour
1 tsp egg replacer
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt

1/4 cup cake flour
1/4 cup korean red pepper, ground

Vegetable oil for frying

for the sushi:

1.5 cups sushi rice
2 cups water
Dash vinegar + 1 tsp sugar
3-4 sheets nori
1 avocado, sliced thin
Small handful daiya cheeze shreds

4 tablespoons nayonaise
1 tablespoon sesame oil

Black sesame seeds, for topping

Break out that sushi mat, ladies and gents, and lesdothis.

Combine your sushi rice and water in a saucepan or rice cooker, bring to a boil, cover, and cook 20 minutes - until the water is absorbed. Remove rice to a large bowl and stick the stuff in the freezer to cool quickly.

Toss your red pepper and flour together. Spread on a plate.

Mix the batter ingredients together and whisk till smooth.

Heat your vegetable oil in a fryer or wok till hot hot hot, and make your tempura - roll each piece of kimchi seperately in the flour/red pepper mix, then dip in the batter, then gently lay in the oil bath. Do only 3 at a time - they cook quickly. Scoop out and lay on paper towels to drain. Repeat until your kimchi is all gone.

Mix your sugar and vinegar together and add to the rice. It's ok if it's still a little warm - just not hot.

Chop your kimchi into 1/2 inch wide pieces (if they don't need chopping, more power to ya - mine did!) and set them out on a plate with your other fillings (avocado, daiya).

Lay out your sushi mat and place a piece of nori rough side up. Grab about a cup of rice from your bowl and press it into the sushi, until it forms a rectangle that stretches to both sides horizontally but leaves a little space at both top and bottom. Press 1/4 of the avocado, then kimchi, then daiya into the rice, and roll away. An awesome how-to video can be found here. Repeat until fillings and rice are gone.

Mix your nayo and sesame oil in a small bowl and thin with just a teeeny bit of water. Slice your sushi with a wet knife, plate, and drizzle sesame nayo over the roll. Top with black sesame seeds, if you'd like.

Mine got a little coneheady BUT that didn't mean they weren't superdelish. A little indulgent, fat wise - tempura + avocado + nayo. But hey, that's what the gym's for *cough*.

Cheers!

Mac 'n 'Chi

This one's for all my hot sauce + mac n cheese loving homies out there.

You know who you are. Frank's, Marie's, Tapatio, Tabasco, something red and fiery has to be sprinkled over the top for that pile of cheese and pasta to really sing for ya. Not like you wouldn't eat it if it weren't there. But you're the one waiting for Texas Pete when your pals are already shoveling.

The beauty of a batch of kimchi is that it's a long term investment - the longer it sits, the stinkier it gets. Its personality changes. It becomes sharper and more pungent with each passing day - textures dull, flavors blend. For some reason, I still eat it quickly, like it's about to go bad, whenever I make a batch. Seldom does a 2 pound kimchi'd napa sit around this house for longer than a week. Good for the guts (I hope).

I've done a ton of pastry baking this week, exploring whether or not I have the chops to start selling the stuff out of an awesome local coffee joint (the long, arduous tale of finding a legal kitchen to cook it in, we'll leave for another time). I think I'm getting there. The reason I tell you this is that I tried the holy cheddar/kimchi combo in a poptart-shaped pastry this week, and found it to be as near perfect a trio of flav as I'd tried in a long while (pasta/bread, cheddar, stinky, spicy pickle). Had to try it with my go-to macaroni cheese recipe, and, well, holy cannoli. Kinda made my week.

Yeah, I used my two-serving corningware. Having any more than that around would have proved quite dangerous, methinks. If you need more, just double/triple the ingredients as needed.

Mac 'n Chi
2 servings

1/3 pound sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
1 tablespoon whole grain mustard
1 tablespoon yellow mustard
1 1/2 tablespoon butter
1 tablespoon flour
2/3 cup milk

1/3 - 1/2 cup kimchi
1 cup cooked elbow macaroni

Butter, for greasing the casserole

Chopped cilantro for garnish, sliced apple for serving

Make the bechamel (boil the noodles while this happens, if you don't have cooked noodles at hand) - melt your butter over medium heat in a small saucepan, add flour, whisk until flour cooks and turns slightly golden. Whisk in mustard, then milk, whisking constantly as the sauce thickens (should take about 2 minutes). Add your cheese and discard your whisk - use a fork to incorporate it completely. Taste for salt.

In your casserole, combine your pasta and kimchi. Add sauce and fold it all together GENTLY. Sprinkle any remaining cheese over the top (or some buttered bread crumbs, hmm yes).

Bake for 20 minutes in a 350f oven, until sides are bubbly. Broil for 2-3 until the top browns a little bit.

Serve with a lightly dressed lemon-arugula salad or sliced green apple. You could be like moi and eat it for breakfast, and get cheese-spaced early in the day, or save it for dinner. Reheats beeeeeautifully! Enjoy!

I love yooo, Soondobuuuu.

I'm going to tell you guys a secret.

I drink pickle juice.

I know, I know. Not healthy. And only occasionally. And I'm even snobby about it - my fav is the water that surrounds properly fermented sour dill pickles. Nerdy, yup.

So when a pal o' mine described to me one of her "I miss Cali" dishes, and how it was kinda pickle soup, I knew I had to either find it somewhere in town or make it myself. And since we're only just starting to see Korean joints pop up in CLT, the latter had to do. She linked me this place - and I went to town.

OMG, baby kimchoy!! Or Bokchi? Hmm. Anyways - a week of fermenting baby bok choy in a shrimp-free Chi recipe produced stinky, wilty, and dare I say, cute results. Little pockets of pickly, spicy awesomeness. They're kind of a mouthful - if you prefer your kimchi more dispersed throughout the brew, chop them a bit before adding.

Traditionally, this stew is made over an open flame in a clay pot, with everything going in fresh and cooking in stages, ending up as one big bowl of tofu, veggies, kimchi, pepper powder or paste, broth, and a big ol' egg cracked in at the very end. Insane. Spicy. Textural. Awesome. I was a tad dubious about my Japanese porcelain holding up to the heat, so I cheated and made the stew in a pot and ladled it into by bowl of choice. I love this dish, and will have to hunt down a proper Ttukbaegi. I'll bet Super G has one hidden somewhere in that vast, stinky space.

Soondubu jjigae with Kimchi
(aka KimChoy stew with Tofu, Veggies, and eggs)
serves 2.


For the broth:
3 cups - use either homemade veggie stock or, like me, faux-beef boullion + water (mushroom would be awesome too)
1 piece kombu
2 bird's eye chilis, split down the middle
Dash sesame oil
3 shitakes, chopped
1/2 onion, chopped


For the rest:
1 cup kimchi
1 tube soondubu
Green onions, chopped
Cilantro, chopped (optional)
1 large egg
3 tablespoons (or more to taste - you know me and tongue-searing, I used more like 5) Korean red pepper paste (like this)

Easy peasy. Heat your oil over medium heat either in your Ttukbaegi or small soup pot and saute onion and mushrooms for 3-4 minutes, until softened. Add remaining ingredients and simmer 10 minutes, until flavors have melded. Remove kombu.

Now, add your pepper paste, herbs, and kimchi, and stir well. Carefully break your tofu into the pot, piecing it up a tad bit, but leaving some large chunks. While soup is still simmering, crack the egg in. Now, you can either stir it in and enrich your stew or let it poach a bit. I chose the former.

One of the rad things about the afore-mention Super G mart we've just recently been blessed with is that they have TONS of banchan. I love lotus root, so I picked up some sesame-soy marinated root to float in my bowl amidst all the salty, spicy awesome.

Serve with banchan and rice. Soooo goooood.